It's been a while...I wonder why...

So Covid-19 took the world into a new way of living...was it what you wanted or needed?

For some people, the international pandemic has been a blessing in disguise because it has allowed them to slow down and take stock.


For me personally it has meant changing the way I have worked and when I work. My wife and I have three children all in primary school, which meant an element of homeschooling, entertaining, refereeing squabbles and being the provider of food what seemed like every 10 minutes.


So how did I keep myself going through this time...

Initially, it was just about keeping the family safe...then it was about keeping the family sain. Mental well-being is a massive thing for me as someone who has massively experienced in the past, and by now using the skills I've learnt to keep it positive.


So for me, one of the ways I have kept it positive was by offering individuals the chance to have therapeutic coaching for free. This meant that I kept my skills up, I talked to other adults and ultimately made a difference, and then for those I helped, they got access to support which they may otherwise not have got.


Initially supporting people via Zoom had its ups and downs...easy access for people to reach me and get help at times that suited, no travel and feeling comfortable...then the downs, internet being used by 4 other devices to stream movies and games, no professional space in the home, noise of children playing/squabbling in the background and this list goes on.


So my solution...

Fast-tracking my goal to have a garden office/coaching space...using some funds set aside it was time to tidy up the garden and create that space. This not only ultimately gave me my space to work, it gave me a focus and goal to drive towards.


So is that it? Is that the key to having mental well-being?

For some people it really is...I can hear you staying..."sorry, what is the key?"


Well on the surface it really is simple and before I share it in more detail let me tell you a short story about young boys and men in the 1920s and 30s...


These caps meant the world to these young boys and men. Not only were they expensive for them, but they also played a part in their identity. They were like gold to them.


So much so they would do anything to make sure they never lost them. Like most boys, they would venture out and explore, and when they would come across a wall or barrier they would throw their caps over them.


By throwing the caps over the barrier would ensure that they would get over or through a said barrier to retrieve them. These caps were like massive magnets drawing them towards, and never giving up until they got them back.


So for them they had a purpose, focus, goal and desire that was so compelling and strong they would take action every day to achieving them goals.


Which direction are you travelling in?

Your motivation is determined by what is most compelling - this could something you don't want to happen or it is could be by something you do want to happen.


Now one of my personal goals was to have a space of my own to work and to coach from that meets my current level of needs...this I had set for 2021...however lockdown gave me an opportunity to make it happen now.


And that is what I did..."I MADE IT HAPPEN." I created the opportunities around me for this to be achieved, I took the steps needed to make it happen and every day I did something that got me that little bit closer.


For this to happen it meant I had to stop doing things that I may have enjoyed doing for the goal to happen, and it also meant I had to do thing I did like do, so the goal would happen.


A brilliant example of this for me is being out in the hot sun and heat...during the initial lockdown there were some really hot days and working in them was not pleasurable for me. Now I could have run away from the heat and stayed indoors...yet I chose to go towards getting that goal reached.


Having a goal

By having a really compelling goal I focused upon that and it's success, driving me to reach it no matter what...because when you focus upon something your unconscious likes to find you evidence to prove you are right.


So if you focus upon negatives you will find them and you will probably find lots of them...so if you focus upon the positives you too will find them.

You will reap what you sow...


Because your unconscious mind is designed to find more proof for you it will easily do this...another thing it likes to do is work on the basis of least effort. Therefore default thinking will do the habitual thinking you have always done. But if you did deliberate thinking and you choose do positive thinking you unconscious will look and provide you with the information. Now some people won't believe this and that find because beliefs are not true, we just act as if they are true...so have you ever decided that you want something so badly that all of a sudden you start to see more and more of them. So for example, if you want a specific car and all of a sudden you see more and more of them, or that you want to have a baby, you see pregnant women and new borns everywhere.


They were always there, you have just become tuned into them just like tuning into a radio station.


So for me, my ability to have positive mental well-being is about having something is so compelling and strong that my default thinking is upon that. This can be a state (a way I want to feel), an item or a specific activity. Knowing what you want for some people is more powerful than knowing what I don't want. So when I work directly with people it is import to know both sides of their coin...what they don't want (which they often know easily) and then what they do want.


So here is are 5 questions for yourself to evaluate where you are and get you thinking...


On a scale of 0 - 10 with 0 being I am totally lost, no way out and 10 being totally in control and taking direction...where are for the next 3 questions

  • Do you know/understand the root of your problem? 0-10

  • Do you know/understand the root of your solution? 0-10

  • How personally driven are you to take action towards your desired outcome? 0-10

What is your total score? If you are over 24 your are well on the path to achieving your desired outcome.


  • So what is critical for you to resolve right now?

  • What is going to happen in the future if you don't get a handle on this?

These 5 questions are designed for you to self-evaluate and to start gaining focus upon moving you towards what and where you want to be.


Clarity and drive with daily action towards your desired outcome is key to your positive mental well-being...I am not saying it will be easy...I am saying you have a choice.


What is the one thing you can do now that will change your life forever? You are one decision away from the life you want.


Choose your direction to the future you want...



If you would like to have a chat about how I can help you with your next steps and decisions to the future you want, then you can simply arrange a totally free no-obligation 30-minute consultation and when you do we can discuss your answers about and I will pose some more to you. CLICK TO BOOK YOUR FREE CALL.


I look forward to discussing with you about your infinite futures and the choices you can make to change your world.

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© 2019 by DB BREAKTHROUGH NLP part of ROTUNDUS CIC